Saturday, March 13, 2010

The things we do...

The things we do for those we love are ridiculous. We lie, we cheat, we steal, and some even die. What is the point if that person doesn't love us back? Oh, they say they do, and they make all the right grand gestures and use every right word, but does anyone over love another person fully and unconditionally? Humans in nature are very selfish beings, we think of ourselves, what can I get out of this, how will this work in my favor, can I turn this in my favor? How will this affect ME ME ME? In believing this, how can we truly believe that we love someone, and how can we open up ourselves enought to believe, truly, that they love us in return?

We love our mothers, they brought us into this world, and they, along with a father, give us love, shelter, food, clothing, and a few creature comforts. Even this can be a selfish kind of love. How many times have people complained about their parents? Mom won't buy me this, Dad won't give me the money for that. But on the other hand, our parents love us unconditionally, and without fail always have our backs. Even when we've drug them through the mud and turmoil that is our teenage years. I'm still a teenager myself, and sometimes I think about my present behavior, and my past, and I cringe, because I'm a bitch to my parents. And for that I am truly sorry. All they have ever done is love me, and they have always been in my corner, even when I was ass backwards wrong.

We say we love our boyfriends, and girlfriends, but when it comes down to it, could we really be there for them when it counts? Because let's face it, kids my age are in lust, not love, and we have no concept of what love really is. We think it's holding hands walking down the hall, meeting after each class to give a quick hug, and maybe a kiss on the cheek. We don't realize that to love someone, truly love them ,we have to make ourselves completely vulnerable, and trust in the person that they will not break us. But we can't. Because human beings are scared in addition to selfish.

To love someone completely is accepting that they're not perfect, and they will make us mad, and on occassion we will want to beat them senseless because they are being so incredibly stupid that it makes you want to hide under a table. But it also means that you lie to them, you cheat for them ,and you steal for them. It means that you accept they imperfections and understand that all of the little quirks, the little oddities that make them up make them utterly and absolutely perfect.

You accept that they're going to California for 3 years, and you move past that. You say damn so whats up. You tell them no im okay with it, really. Yeah, of course I understand, it's just your life now, so let's get used to it. You lie to yourself, and eventually you start to believe it, just a little, and one day you'll forget that you didn't. You don't let on about the nights and days you go by held together by a thread, and you don't tell them about the one tear that can break a dam. You lie. Because it helps them. That is love, and it is hard, and sucks, and its life.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Personality types

OMG this thing is scary accurate, take the test and comment on what you got!! I'll post a couple links that describe mine, I got ENFP